This Aint Easy

Spent the day reviewing Real Property in preparation for the first day of BarBri lectures. Curiously, we are starting with what is conceivably the most difficult subject on the bar: real property.

Most of today I spent chipping away at the Rule Against Perpetuities, Restraints on Alienation, Landlord-Tenant Law and Fixtures which constitute only 25% of real property. I am thankful to have 3 more days to finish it up as I listen to the live lectures. (Only 8 more weeks of lectures to go!)

That's 7 hours today. A relatively easy day on my brain. Still, even as I sit and write this, my brain feels shot. I usually have 10 things going on at any given point. When I focus on a single thing, my brain works on overdrive so invariably I walk away with a tired mind.

Its a very interesting experience to place all of my energies on a single thing. Its so unnatural. I talked about this with fellow law students and there is a consensus among us that this is extremely unnatural. I didn't stress about my theses, applying to law school, about anything really enough to focus only on that single thing. Heck, I was writing up a thesis the week before the LSAT and practically waltzed in supremely confident that everything would work out even though I had only studied 15 or less hours.

After 3 years of law school, there is not a single law student that is even considering taking that approach. The Bar is truly the great equalizer. Gunners and back seaters alike are strapping down, spreading their BarBri convisers and PMBR question books across tables everywhere and settling in for a very long summer. No one wants to gamble their future away.

Truly, this is a war that is going to be fought. I need: work, prayer and self-confidence to make it through. The greater of these is prayer.

BarBri Day 2

Reviewing evidence and constitutional law today. I am currently at the law school in an upstairs conference room reading the evidence outline on BarBri's study smart. Its a useful tool, though it doesn't make the prospect of studying evidence any more appealing.

The classes are extremely full and lunch is always a run for a seat in any restaurant in the vicinity. I had chinese on Monday and pizza today. Overall, it was still the best part of my day. Getting tired of the gunners who seem to want to make law jokes for everything under the sun. Get over it guys, otherwise I am going to start knocking heads with my outline book.

The lecturer is a little less interesting than the PMBR lecturers. He seems to love to make jokes out of everything and is often a little random. I think part of it is due to the fact that PMBR's questions were attuned to the general structure of the subject matter while Barbri's are randomized. I suppose that Barbri gives a more realistic approach to how we might encounter the MBE but it fails to meet the difficulty standard that the PMBR questions raise. 

There are some conflicts between the strategies that PMBR and Barbri present and I have yet to make a happy bargain between the two. I am going to try and fit in PMBR questions every night alongside BarBri question. I originally intended to completely drop BarBri questions and just go with the PMBR questions but I decided it would be best to try and master both styles.

Let's see how it works out in a few months.

I had a moment yesterday when I flat out realized that I was an underdog. There was someone who once told me, "you are not meant to be leadership, you are a worker." At the time, I discarded the comment easily. Today, I do not discard it as easily because it shows me the kind of people that surround me.

I live myself according to my rule of thumb. I am neither looking back, left or right to see who is stands beside me or behind me. My measure of success is not that of another's success nor is it an elusive dream that is beyond my grasp. It is simply: the extent of the sweat of my brow and the feeling in my heart. The moment something is easy, I move on to something harder.

There will always be people around you who fail to see through the glass. There are those who take this as arrogance. Indifference is not arrogance. There is a difference. I strive to be indifferent as to the machinations of their mind, of their jealousy, their frustration, their foiled attempts at defining my motivations. 

My heart beats fast and hard for the work that I do, for the people I serve and for the dreams that I harbor in my sleep. I will not be the person you expect me to be because I wasn't made to sit and be still.  Most certainly, I will fall and fail but I will fail having tried my best.

Day 4 of PMBR

I met a new instructor from PMBR today. He was a short, round bellied man with frizzy hair sticking out of the sides of his face. I recognized him immediately as the man I watched online the night before the MPRE and the sole person I credit for getting me a 104 when I had not studied at all. Gushing praise, I thanked him like he was some kind of celebrity.

Today we did Criminal Law and Procedure and I failed miserably having never taken any procedural classes in law school but the lecturer assured me that once I learned the material I would be scoring fine. 

For lunch, I had Boston Market dark piece chicken (I love the dark meat!), macaroni and cheese, potato salad and the divine cornbread they serve. Again, the eating was the best part of my day.

The restaurants are pretty far away from the PMBR location so it is usually a nice 25 minute walk. However, since the hotel is near LAX, planes fly terribly close overhead. The first time one passed over us as we walked to lunch I had the gall to look up. It was just 200-300 feet over us and I felt like I was looking at the belly of a massive metal beast that could just fall straight over me. The idea of being flattened like an ant made my heart race fast. Of course, I think a lot of this is pure paranoia but in the word of bar studying, you do not question the facts, you simply accept every ridiculous fact scenario that is placed before you and devise the best legal solution. After so many ridiculous questions that day, a plane falling on me seemed like a viable possibility. Needless to say, the experience left me a little traumatized and I do not look up when I hear the planes fly overhead anymore.

The lecture in the afternoon sped by so quickly. I've just converted to a mac so I discovered I can do all sorts of things I never could on a windows platform to improve my efficiency. Word mac gives you the option of using notebook layout view. I've used that to tab and separate the different MBE subjects. It also lets you put red flags or question marks next to the text so I've used that to highlight specific MBE strategies. I've also started recording class on my word mac. The audio file attaches to the document and can be reopened and recorded continuously. I also figured out how to export the file as a mp4 so I can keep my lectures separate. This is going to be so useful for Barbri. Finally, you can use word mac to convert your text into audio and place it directly on your ipod. I will try this out later when I have enough to listen to.

Wow. I just realized how terribly geeky that all sounded. 

See you all tomorrow,

Mademoiselle

The Bar

Law school's ended. And I've started PMBR. BarBri starts next Monday and I am taking an independent course on Sundays just for the performance test portion of the Bar. So I've covered all my bases: multiple choice, exams and the performance test. 

Let me tell you that it is exhausting. Nobody tells you that graduation is exhausting but it is. And then come Monday, just two days after graduation and you find yourself sitting in a cold hotel conference room doing MBE practice questions, and sitting through an afternoon lecture while the lecturer drones on about the given subject for the day.

I've dragged myself home every day this week and slept at 9PM, completely and utterly exhausted. 

But funny thing, the Bar has made me a healthier person. I went to Ralphs and Trader Joes three times in two days and got a cartload of deli meats, cheese, vegetables, and yogurt. Every morning I drink a power shot yogurt while the lecturer explains what questions we will be doing for the day. I drink cold water to keep me awake (because I did fall asleep 3 times during one particular round of MBE questions). For lunch, I eat a turkey sandwich I packed, with some fresh broccoli and cauliflower, a tiny chocolate for dessert. In the afternoon, I have more water and nuts and berries. For dinner, I have salad, half a sandwich or left overs as I am usually so exhausted that I just want to sleep. I honestly think the most exciting part of my day is the power shot yogurt. After that, its all downhill.

And another thing. No internet access all day. That means I check my email less often (not the neurotic 15 times a day I usually do), and I don't facebook, twitter whatever. No messenger, no nada. Just me and good old Word as I type away the confrontation clause or the character/habit rules. And I'm too tired to watch my Asian dramas. Seriously. I just check and respond to email, switch dates/appointments and I am out.

I'm living the life of a nun. A nun with a purpose people. 

Of course, a person like me needs to vent. I need to tell you how ridiculously horrible the bathroom smells in the Ramada by LAX or how you should never create Bar study groups because you are bound to frustrate the initial purpose of bar study. I don't know. Its all random at this point. Let's just say that you'll be hearing from me.

Federal Rule of Evidence of the Day:

FRE 804(b)(3): Declaration Against Interest

a.   Statement of an:

                                 i.     unavailable

                               ii.     non party (generally)

                              iii.     against interest when made (penal, pecuniary, or proprietary)

Have at it. 

In the Corridor

Last night in the law school corridor, I found a homeless woman.  It was late and I had stayed because I was determined to write ten pages before I left for home and I had gone from the lab to the main hall to get coffee to keep me going. It was my last dollar and I was determined that coffee would jolt me awake.

Her smell was strong. I noticed the odor as soon as I rounded the corner, still 100 feet away from where she was sitting facing away from me. As I approached her, I noticed that she was sitting there dazed. I bought my coffee and offered it to her. She politely rejected it but I pressed it on her when I noticed her tears.

She started a conversation with me and I answered. But she wasn't looking at me, she was still dazed. Unable to do anything else, I left her and asked the maintenance person if she was ok. "Diabetes," she told me, "its made her blind. Poor woman." 

I turned and watched the woman, speaking to herself about a birth certificate and some other things that didn't make sense and I felt sad. Interesting that she should be here, hopeful that the security guard might not kick her out tonight. And I noticed something else. Beside her, there were packages of food, drinks and more coffee. Apparently other law students also offered her food. But it seemed lost on her. She didn't seem like she was here. And the only relief students could offer her didn't seem to be of any help.

Current Thoughts

To perm or not to perm? That is the question.

Persons possibly infected with the swine flu must be quarantined. I have a whole of people I suspect may have swine flu. QUARANTINE THEM!

Obssessed with tajoyaki. Where are you my takoyaki? I miss you... muu muu muuu muu